Top 10 tax tips from CPAs, also known as Letterman’s annual spoofing of taxes

April 16, 2011

As the annual tax-filing deadline nears, David Letterman recruits New York area accountants to deliver a list of Top 10 Tax Tips.

I recommend watching the tax pros present the tips. The delivery of a couple of the numbers crunchers isn't too bad.

But if you don't have time — maybe you're busy finishing your or a client's return — here's the list:

10. Deadlines are just suggestions. File your taxes whenever you want.

  9. Warlocks cannot claim trolls as dependents.

  8. Make filing more personable by naming your calculator. Mine is named "Owen."

  7. Make make sure your accountant went to a real school and not a phony Internet college like I did.

  6. H. Block, good guy. R.Block, complete greaseball.

  5. Getting a refund? Log on to IRS.gov to spin the wheel and play "double or nothing."

  4. If you don't remember your Social Security number, make one up.

  3. Do not use Wesley Snipes' accountant.

  2. Not really a tax tip, but accountants are wild in the sack.

And the number one tax tip this year is

  1. Take it from me, prison's not so bad.

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